I listened again today and learned more about my own behaviour. Afterwards, I came away with a nagging question. How do I engage in conversation and not add fuel to victim narratives by association? Tough one. When I started this re-do, one goal was to become more attuned to language that is negative. I’ve heard a lot of it lately, but chimed in knowing full well I was complicit. Ugh. The good thing, however, is that I knew full well I was complicit.
One thing I’ve found, or rather am finding out, is that speaking ill of anyone makes me feel bad. It should. When I trash talk someone else, I’m trashing myself. Since we’re extensions of the other, as in all one, everything we see in another is part of our own journey, our essence in fact. When others get under our skins, upset us, even hurt us, we are choosing that experience. Often times we get angry because we are resisting a teaching. We don’t like to be shown our dark side. And who likes to change? Other times we’re noticing what we’ve left behind. We notice in others’ behaviour something we’ve successfully altered. These moments should make us happy, but don’t get cocky. Arrogance is not attractive. Neither is false pride. Plus, realizing you’ve changed could mean you have to move on.
I’ve been moving on my whole life but not always for the right reasons. It is with confidence and a grateful heart I can say I’m no longer running from anything. How delightful it feels, too. Of course, I might still have moving on to do, but that’s a normal and natural progression in life. Well, it should be.
So my wish tonight is for graceful ease when change is needed. We sometimes become addicted to chaos and drama, unaware we are creating it. When we become aware of the fact, however, that we are writing our own story, both the good and not so good parts, we owe it to ourselves and others to take responsibility and try to drop the histrionics. And we will as we become more aware. Awareness demands it. Are you listening?