So, I’m working away on the book today, (was not) and wondering why I can’t get rid of my belly fat more effectively, or at all. I found myself pondering its importance. And then I realized it mattered because I laid it out as a ‘to-do’ in my re-do list. And I have lost weight but it’s really hard to tell in my belly. So, I’m like, “Let’s post an after shot”. But NO WAY. It’s not that different than the before shot and I’m so over humiliating myself. Well, in this moment, anywho. Sigh. Needless to say, all that wondering got me to questioning how the subconscious plays into my inability to let go of this unwanted fat.
Now, I haven’t been delving too deeply on my own, but have been reading about the actions of the subconscious mind. It’s heavy going in more ways than one, and can be difficult differentiating between the layers of the mind’s businesses, but all is well, so far, at least. A couple of articles have brought some peace. No obvious direction yet, but more calm to my current storm of stagnation.
One radical revelation has been introduced to me on the subject of pain. Over my life I’ve been prone to a bit of pain both external and self-inflicted. When in its grip, I browbeat myself, feeling a proper failure. On occasion, others have commented that there must be something wrong with me. How can I speak to “the path” when I’m not even on it myself? Of course, my self-flagellation’s are exacerbated by these kinds of comments unleashing a kaleidoscope of emotions within. Few of them are pleasant. And I’ve no doubt lots of folks go round on this kind of wheel. But, maybe there’s another way to look at it.
In an earlier blog on soul contracts, I suggest that perhaps our pain is written into the contract as an opportunity for learning. How do I reconcile that with separation from Source, though? Did I actually chose to separate from joy, love, and all light? Yes.
We separate from Source when we need to learn, feel deeply, and further understand what it means to be separated. The trick is, and the learning only takes place, when we come back and reconnect the link. And if this is true, then I for one, see my pain, and the pain of others, differently.
Wishing you tonight, the courage to feel whatever comes without fear, or blame. You are not the disease, the sorrow, the heartache, or the suffering, unless you make it so. Still, do not run from it, either. You can gain more insight, a deeper knowing, and move closer to transcendence. Feel it all, then make your way back to love, the secret chord. Halleluiah.